Tuesday, May 27, 2008

HATCHING MY EVIL PLOT

So I'm talking total gibberish to dad and throw in the word "snack" a few times. He mentions that he is going to call mom and tell her to pick up a "Hot and Ready" on the way home from taking the munchkins in for their 2 week check-ups. So, I keep yammering the words "howwaweddy" and the old man at no time produces a pizza box.

So now I am forced to devise an evil plot, as is obvious from my evil grin and Dick Cheney hand wringing.

So, mere seconds after Dad goes into the bathroom and does this whole lock the door thing (which is new, cause he says I have gotten a little "pokey" what ever that means). So he goes in, closes the door, and I run straight for the freezer and pull out a Totinos (which is like cardboard with Ketchup and baloney, and lets be honest, a Hot and Ready from Little Caesars is barely edible, but dad would rather eat dirt than stand in a checkout line).

So I pull out the Totinos, throw it in the microwave and push the "clear", "add 1 minute", and "start" buttons, just like dad taught me (because he is too lazy to make chicken nuggets for me at lunchtime so he taught me how to do it myself, what am I 4?)

So anyway, Dad comes out of the bathroom, and hears this 'ding ding', so he walks around like a moron checking the washer and dryer (the dryer is on top of the washer, I am like 3 feet tall, who would look at something 6 feet off the ground?) then looks at the stove, then checks his phone, finally he rolls around to the microwave, opens it and sees my culinary masterpiece, but for some reason doesn't look to happy that I took care of our little "starvation episode" that we were having.

So check this out, he then takes the pizza out of the microwave, puts it in the trash.


But does it end there?

I'm thinking a 2 minute time-out and a lecture, but this guy never ceases to amaze me..

He doesn't yell, or send me to the stairs, he decides instead to make a spectacle of this incident, get this, he goes over to the garbage can, pulls out the pizza, and puts it back in the microwave and does this whole "dramatic recreation" all Americas Most Wanted style and takes a picture for your viewing pleasure.


So what am I supposed to learn from this incident? We take stuff out of the garbage and pretend to cook it for dramatic effect?

Wait till I tell mom that dad is taking food out of the garbage and putting it in the microwave, I doubt this will look good when it comes time for "Responsible Dad of the Year" voting.

I'M GONNA GET YOU SUCKA...

Don't mess with me or I will treat you like that sissy chicken in the last post.

Not only will I glare at you with this menacing stare, I will poke you with one of the spikes on my head.

CARNATAUR...

All chickens, turkeys and Cornish game hens beware, you can run (even without your heads) but you cannot hide. Mason got his first drumstick this week, and loved every minute of it.

What is it about boys and tearing into flesh using nothing but your bare hands and teeth? Does it make us feel like the T-Rex we always wanted to be?

You decide.

MASON SLEEPING... CONTINUED

I have no explanation for this. One minute we are brushing teeth, reading truck books, watching U2 videos and episodes of Thomas the Train on the iPhone.

I leave for an hour, one measly hour, I come back to check on the kid and this is what I find. Mason is sleeping with a pillow covering his whole body.

Again, I have no explanation for this.

Sunday, May 25, 2008

Seriously?

The upcoming presidential elections are a big topic of discussion in our house. Brig has said for years that Hillary would run. He wants her to win because he remembers how funny Leno's monologues were when Bill was in the White House. He says that a Clinton in office makes for good TV.

Brig guessed her Michigan and Florida strategy back when she left her name on the ballot. We know that the Clinton's think that they are above the rules -- even ones made by their own political party.

We laughed when she talked up her diplomatic experiences and her participation in the peace process abroad. It was even funnier when she talked about landing under sniper fire. They already are giving Leno some good material.

However, it seems that Hillary no longer can win the race. But she keeps going. And here's her reason, in her own words:

"My husband did not wrap up the nomination in 1992 until he won the California primary somewhere in the middle of June, right? We all remember Bobby Kennedy was assassinated in June in California. I don't understand it."

She doesn't understand it? She has a law degree from Yale and did her undergrad at Wellesley and she doesn't remember that California already had its primary. And that while California was at the beginning of her husband's run for election, she is at the end.
And even worse, what is up with bringing up the assassination of a candidate. Is that what she's waiting for?

Seriously?

And in case you're wondering, Brig says she's getting too old to run again. He thinks that Chelsea might get married and have kids -- and no one would want a grandma in the White House. That and we don't want to see her age in office.

Monday, May 19, 2008

Trip Report - 5/19/08

Log Bridge

Mason and I went hiking this morning. We found a really cool log bridge to play on. Here is Mason checking out the rapids.















Defying the Odds

Mason is having fun on the bridge.





Throwing Rocks

Mason, doing what he does best. He probably threw about 100 rocks from this spot.










Lunch Time

Mason enjoying an Oreo. We only went up to the first bridge, then sat down and had snacks.

The Rock

So, Mason used to just pick up a rock on every trip, put it in his pocket, and hike back. Now I think he is just out to get me. He finds the biggest rock he can get his greasy Oreo covered mitts on and puts it in "my" pocket. Then he trys to switch it out with bigger rocks all the way back down the canyon.

Climbing Trip #2

The Approach

Mason and I went on another climbing trip this week. This week we went to conquer Meadow Muffin, a nice little 5.12a.
This is the approach to the base of the climb. Look at that form, using both hands and legs.





The Assent

Mason is attempting a gnarly looking off-width crack in this shot. Holding on to the rope shows bad form, but we'll give him some leeway since he is only two.







The Summit.

For demonstrations purposes only, we will call this the summit. In reality, this is the base of Meadow Muffin, above this is it pretty vertical, but when you are 2, getting to the base of the actual climb is accomplishment enough.





The Snacks.

At the base of Meadow Muffin, there is a really nice ledge, today we will call this "Lunch Lady Ledge." Here we stopped off for a look below to the canyon floor, as well as some water.






More Snacks?

When you are 2, there is no end to the fruit snacks. Mason decided that he needed to carbo-load for the decent.









Base Camp.

This is Mason enjoying his time at the bottom of the wall. I had to go back up and clean all of the gear from the climb, but Mason waited patiently back on Terra Firma. Although he walked away with a few battle wounds, it was a good day on the walls. Today's lessons were all about the gear. Playing with the carabiners and the rope, and learning to swing a bit. Next time we will climb on more vertical climbs and take some 6 -10 inch falls. Slowly but surely...

After this we went up the canyon to work on getting used to heights. we climbed the back side of a 30' wall, just so we could lay on the edge and get used to looking down. Mason is getting quite comfortable with heights, and with the gear, so now it is all about making sure that he is not too comfortable.

Sunday, May 18, 2008

Just the Three of Us... Youse and I



Sing to the Tune of Punk Rock Girl, by the Dead Milkmen:

"I spent a Monday with my Grammy Sue, then you came home and all that I could see was two, little punks they are so cute, you can't refute lets take naps in the crib, I still look good in a bib."

"I tapped Alex on the shoulder said do you have my bear, he looked at me and for a sec he had to stare, Hey! Mason you're my big bro, teach me to throw, when I get real big I don't want to learn from that dude Brig."




Mason has had mixed emotions about the twins. Here is a good shot of him checking out the little guys. Other than sorting out who's teddy bear is who's, he is doing pretty well.

Sleeping Giants

That is Alex on the left and Brady on the right. It is pretty easy to tell them apart (even if you don't look at the huge bruise on Brady's dome) because Alex looks like a little "old" man with a long thin face and, and Brady has a pretty square well filled out defined face with broad features.

So far they are sharing a crib, we'll see how long we can keep them in here before the crib is busting at the seams.

Did I Authorize This?



Koa was a little confused, he has been here before. Lady with big belly leaves for 2 days, then comes back with smaller belly and a kid. But somehow this time was different. Ok, belly was bigger, but how did this 2 baby thing happen?

Koa kept running from baby to baby to Mason to baby to baby to Mason trying to figure out what was going on. I think he has finally figured out that the return policy had expired on these new additions and they are here to stay.

He is getting all worn out. Every time one of them cries Koa takes off running to see what is wrong, it is no help that sometimes one is upstairs and one down, he is getting quite the workout.

Day 2, The Awakening.




Brig and Da' Boyz

This is my crew, all 56 pounds worth. I still think I can take all 3 of them though in a no holds barred cage match. How long do YOU think that will last. I've got my dollars on about 11 years.

Day 1, The Reckoning



How lucky am I, I just happen to have two arms, the perfect number to handle 2 chillins'. This was not a bad day, since Brady (chillin #2/ chillin #huge) had a huge bruise from the suction cup that "helped" him along (seriously, the bruise looked like someone glued a hockey puck to the back of his head), the nurses took turns holding him in the nursery all night while Stephanie and I got some sleep.

Monday, May 12, 2008

Holy Cow




There really are 2, here is the proof. That is Brady on the Left and Alex on the Right. Alex is trying to get in some Z's cause you know, he has been waiting around for like 2 hours, Brady has only been around for like 10 minutes in this shot, so he is still freaking out. Hopefully they will have a good chat and Alex can show Brady the ropes.

And in this Corner..!



Brady comes to the nursery weighing in at 8 pounds 2 ounces. Standing giant style at 21 1/2 inches, this bruiser is as stocky as they come.

Kid opened his eyes and looked at me and it was a sinister stare. Look for lots of devious trouble from this striker.

Alex in the House...!




Alex decided to show up right around 1pm. We weighs in at a trim 7 pounds 6 ounces. Standing at 20 inches, with an impressive wingspan and tight curly redish/blonde hair.

Honey, Where's My Super Suit?



Where is my Super Suit Woman..!

Now this is what I call Classy. I had to get all dressed up for the deliveries. Now we are ready for action!

Get them out...now!

Here is when we got to the hospital this morning around 7



















And here is just a few minutes ago.



Nurse said we are at an 8 or nine so about 15 minutes to go... And we get this nice cheesy grin from stephanie, it is all she could eek out.

Sunday, May 04, 2008

Munchkin Climbing Trip . . .




















For our anniversary, Mason got a climbing harness. I'm still trying to figure out how Mason got something for our anniversary, but I guess it is more for Brig than for Mason. Brig thinks that this is, (and I quote) "hands down the best anniversary gift ever."




















So, Mason went on his first climbing trip. And Brig and Mason had an awesome time. He climbed like a champ. The climb he did was about 15-20 feet, and pretty vertical with nice big stairs to climb on. The hike up to the climb is only about half a mile, but when we got up there, we got down to business.







































He loves his harness and even wore it home from the climb.